How to wrap up a Feedback Conversation (for now)

Recently I had a question from a leader I am coaching. She is preparing to offer feedback to one of her ‘interesting’ direct reports and she is feeling pretty apprehensive about how it is going to go. She has completed the Warm Up conversation with them and said it ‘went better than I thought’. In our most recent coaching session, she asked about the upcoming Work Out conversation (where she will actually offer the feedback):

After I offer the feedback, and we talk it through, how do I end the conversation without it being awkward? I don’t want to seem like I’m running away.

Feedback is a series of conversations, not a speech.

It is useful to think of feedback as a series of smaller conversations, rather than a one-sided speech you can rehearse and deliver, end, and leave the room! Her question is such a great one. If you think about it, the Feedback Fitness Framework is made up of five conversations, meaning five conversation endings!

The Five Conversations in the Feedback Fitness Framework:

Warm Up Conversation - The longer conversation about feedback, but you don’t offer any feedback.
Work Out Conversation – Where you offer the feedback and talk about it.
Cool Down Conversation - I minute later
Cool Down Conversation - 1 day later
Cool Down Conversation - 1 week later

Ideas to wrap up the feedback topic and move on to the next topic:

‘Before we move on to our next topic, can you think of anything we missed / didn’t consider (about the feedback topic)?’
‘Let’s leave that (feedback) topic here for now. Before we move on to discuss XYZ, is there anything else you need from me to implement the feedback / changes etc?’
‘Just before we move on to topic XYZ, can you think of anything else that may get in the way of you implementing the feedback / changes etc?’
Before we move on to our next topic, what has been the most useful for you in our conversation about (feedback topic)?

Ideas to wrap up the conversation, but keep the communication about the feedback open:

Sing out if you think of anything else regarding the (feedback topic).
I’ll reach out / be in touch. (Cool Down Conversations).
I’ll touch base with you about (feedback topic) in a day or two but let me know if you have any questions before then.
Please let me know how you go with (the feedback), so we can talk about next steps.

When you really need to finish a conversation (but the other person keeps talking)

My ‘go to’ statements to end a conversation are:

‘Are you ok if we leave it there for now?’ (nodding yes)
‘Ok, well right now seems like a good time to wrap up….’

Try out strategies for yourself. Ensure they sound respectful, and sound and feel authentic for you.